Marriage is in decline, no new news there. The question seems to have shifted from when and to whom should you get married to should you get married at all? Certainly there is no one simple answer to this questions. Looking at a brief history of marriage reveals that the societal and relational view of marriage has certainly changed over time. During several recent conversations about marriage and relationships I have found myself wondering if marriage is really necessary for today’s couple? Some of these conversations involved my spouse and I chatting with happily married couples and others with contemporaries who are as of yet foregoing marriage. In essence, these conversations have been an effort to interpret general beliefs about marriage and to try to understand why the institution still has value.
It seems to me that there is no argument about the practical benefits. In our society marriage gives you legal, medical, taxation and many other rights that unmarried counterparts may not have. There doesn’t even seem to be an argument about the commitment part. It seems those opting out don’t particularly like the word marriage. So what is it about the word that leaves a bad taste? Continue reading Should you get married?
You can find just about anything online these days, what about free online marriage counseling? There are no shortages of articles, forums, advice columns and chats to read and participate in. While there is a lot of great information to be found, there’s also much misinformation from folks who have no place giving it out. So how do you separate the good, bad and the ugly?
Focus on marriage education programs, these kinds of programs offer real, practical skills for making changes in your relationship. Look for articles written by professionals associated with the program to give you a sense for whether or not they are reputable, trained and can teach you something. Marriage education programs often offer some amount of material for free and then if you want to continue you can pay a small fee.
Understand that the most important thing you can do to fix a relationship is to fix yourself. There is a “fundamental law of relational theory” according to Psychiatrist Marina Benjamin “that when any part of a system changes, the entire system will be forced to change.” What this means is that the more you are able to effect positive change on yourself, the more your relationship will move in that direction. Marriage education programs are perfect for situations where one spouse is interested in working and the other is resistant. Continue reading Is free online marriage counseling possible?
The more siblings you grew up with, the longer your marriage will last, reports a new study from Ohio State University. For the study, the researchers crunched data on 57,061 adults collected between 1972 and 2012.
“We found that if you had a sibling, for each additional sibling your divorce rate decreased by two percent,” said Douglas Downey, co-author of the study, in an interview for CBSNews.com. Only-children were less likely to marry in general than their peers with siblings, as well as being more at risk for divorce. The benefits of having more siblings seem to level off at seven. The evidence does seem to suggest that having siblings can actually help your marriage! Continue reading Does having siblings help your marriage?
Throughout this week, The Early Show introduces its audience to the people who have had a positive impact on its co-anchors.
In an article by Rome Neal, Harry Smith recalls a rough patch in his life and how Power of Two’s very own Dr. Heitler helped him see the light at the end of the tunnel. Dr. Heitler diagnosed the co-anchor as depressed and clinically anxious. Ever more important, Dr. Heitler recognized that these issues were fixable.
In time, Harry introduced Dr. Heitler to his bride-to-be. With guidence from Dr. Heitler, they built a foundation for a partnersip that endures to this day.
In praise of Dr. Heitler, Smith said, ” People come from different worlds, different emotional backgrounds, and the time that Andrea and I spent with Susan [Heitler] was nothing short of invaluable.”
For more information on depression and anxiety, check out:
Depression: A Disorder of Power
Anxiety: Friend or Foe?