After reading this fantastic article I decided it is a must share…
Is Marriage Good for Your Health?
Published: April 12, 2010 By: Tara Parker-Pope
In 1858 a British epidemiologist by the name of William Farr set out to study the relative mortality rates among the married and unmarried. Farr was among the first to suggest that there is a health advantage to marriage. And while times have changed, and created more categories to consider, such as couples living together, gay couples, and couples who have gotten divorced… Farr’s research has stood the test of time.
Scientists continue to document the “marriage advantage”: the fact that married people, on average, appear to be healthier and live longer.
Such research has stimulated both politics and policy, fueling national marriage-promoting effort. In fact, Power of Two’s own birth was the result of the Healthy Marriage Initiative of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
And that’s where we come in. Several new studies have shown that the “marital advantage” doesn’t extend to those in troubled relationships. And thus… we do what we do. At the Power of Two, we are taking on the world one couple at a time. It is our mission to equip couples with the skills to make their marriages not only endue, but flourish!
Mr. Pittman eloquently, and with no lack of spunk, discusses his 30+ years of clinical experience dealing with disintegrating marriages. In particular, he discusses the mess that is infidelity, and how over the past thirty-odd years he has come to be surprised by little. I found his discussion on the “different kinds” of infidelity especially interesting.
So… if for any reason, whatsoever, you’re interested in a good read on infidelity… look no further, it’s here.
The article profiles researchers who analyzed the effects of touch based interactions in professional basketball. The team coded every bump, hug and high five in a single game played by each team in the National Basketball Association early last season.
In a paper due out this year in the journal Emotion, the team reports that with a few exceptions, good teams tended to be touchier than bad ones.
So, I know you’re dieing to know… What does all of this have to do with relationships?
This Ladies’ Home Journal Q&A is a tough one. A reader describes a tough situation, in which her marriage was affected by her own depression and past hurtful treatment towards her husband. Now, he’s moved out, and while she’s sought treatment and seeks resolution with her husband, he has begun to suffer from his own bout of depression and regards their life together with a more “closed door” attitude.
What’s a wife to do?
Dr. Heitler encourages the reader to remember her husband’s depression, which may allow her take his reluctance to reconnect less personally. Heitler recommends a heart to heart, which may help the reader to understand her husband’s concerns about reconciliation.
Depression can wreak havoc on even the strongest relationships, read more to learn the rest of Dr. Heitler’s recommendations.
Power of Two absolutely loves the article, “Our Kids Drove Us Crazy” from Ladie’s Home Journal. Annette and Michael Feinstein have, what they like to call, “boomerang kids.” Their two children, then 25 and 26, had both returned home after college. As parents, Michael and Annette found themselves on opposite sides of the table when it came to the children moving on — and out.
After two years of a full house, Annette had had enough. She moved out.
Credit card debt is a tough topic. While it might be tempting to try and keep it from your spouse, as an adult, it’s important to come clean.
No one wants to incur their spouse’s anger, at the same time remind yourself that it to shall pass. Still, you must be thoughtful about how and when you tell you husband. Read Dr. Heitler’s suggestions.
Do you feel more like a maid than a wife and mother? You’re not alone.
In this LHJ Q&A session, Dr. Heitler addresses the key concept of being teammates. It may sound silly, but when it comes to the dision of labor in a marriage, you need to work together!
Dr. Heitler suggests creating an official task list. Then, sit down together and go through the list, taking turns selecting tasks. Keep at it until the whole list has been accounted for. Whatever you do, don’t criticize your husband’s way of doing things. Instead offer encouragement for his efforts, and be careful not to gradually start t o pick up or re-do his tasks.
Power of Two is excited to see Dr. Heitler as a contributor to one of the longest running segments in Ladies’ Home Journal: Can this Marriage Be Saved?
So, what happens when LHJ catches up with a couple who, eight years ago, were on the brink of divorce?
Great News! The couple just celebrated their 31st anniversary and have welcomed 3 grandchildren to the family. How did they do it? The couple consulted Power of Two’s Dr. Heitler. With her help, they were able to forge a new path based on mutual respect and communication.
Once again, we’re having fun reading Dr. Heitler’s latest advice on how to save your marriage. Ladies’ Home Journal just came out with a Q&A on how to keep anger and fighting from ruining your marriage. The bottom line– control and anger don’t work– skilled communication and mutual appreciation do!